What is Epifun you might ask? It throws some credence to the struggle I deal with here at home. That struggle is my kids wrecking everything, getting into things they shouldn't, and the same pervasive traits I portrayed as a child.......In other words, they get into EVERYTHING! It seems that no matter what type of discipline I use, they are ultra curious and I am tired of coming out to see scenes such as a full box of Honeycomb I just bought poured into my crock pot and 3/4 of a gallon of milk floating inside it being eaten downstairs next to the furnace by one of the little TEAM T girls.
Today was the boiling point for my tolerance of the kids invading all things that were sacred and dangerous in our home......Twas only after seeing my oldest child come running to me with our EMERGENCY "EPI PEN" THAT WAS RESERVED FOR ALLERGIC REACTION EMERGENCIES PROTRUDING THROUGH HER ENTIRE THUMB AND THUMBNAIL (see pic below) THAT I KNEW IT WAS TIME TO "LOCK HER DOWN!"
LOCK HER DOWN is the order of the day.......No more ansering a cell phone call or being distracted only to see 15 freshly bought Twinkies ground into the carpet.....All of our food cupboards including the fridge are now locked down.....We have one great big utility closet that hosts all the guns, knives, medicine, cleaning supplies etc in our home......No more suprises......
For you to understand what happen, I must explain that she came running to me with the EPIPEN with its 1 and a 1/2 inch long needle protruding through her thumb all the way out and extending through her thumbnail........WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I drove in anger to the hardware store and bought so many locks and lengths of chain that the clerk said, "sir, let me help you" as I operated the large metal chain cutting machine which held a placard saying "associates only". I walked out of that place with a sizable bill. Let me show you the progress so far!
Today was the boiling point for my tolerance of the kids invading all things that were sacred and dangerous in our home......Twas only after seeing my oldest child come running to me with our EMERGENCY "EPI PEN" THAT WAS RESERVED FOR ALLERGIC REACTION EMERGENCIES PROTRUDING THROUGH HER ENTIRE THUMB AND THUMBNAIL (see pic below) THAT I KNEW IT WAS TIME TO "LOCK HER DOWN!"
LOCK HER DOWN is the order of the day.......No more ansering a cell phone call or being distracted only to see 15 freshly bought Twinkies ground into the carpet.....All of our food cupboards including the fridge are now locked down.....We have one great big utility closet that hosts all the guns, knives, medicine, cleaning supplies etc in our home......No more suprises......
For you to understand what happen, I must explain that she came running to me with the EPIPEN with its 1 and a 1/2 inch long needle protruding through her thumb all the way out and extending through her thumbnail........WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I drove in anger to the hardware store and bought so many locks and lengths of chain that the clerk said, "sir, let me help you" as I operated the large metal chain cutting machine which held a placard saying "associates only". I walked out of that place with a sizable bill. Let me show you the progress so far!
We are so relieved that now the camp is no longer overrun! These kids are not in control, we are! And we will stay the course! I must clarify that we love our kids and it may seem that this is all a little overboard, however, I will not continue to watch the groceries I buy be wasted (such as when I saw one of my three foot long $40 rolls of custom made smoked Venison being used as a sword in a Nerf fight) and now the children do not have any access whatsoever to any gun, knife, medicine, cleaning supply, nail polish, scissors, clippers, bow/arrow and THEY WILL NOT BE EATING A CROUTON WITHOUT US ALLOWING IT TO HAPPEN!
Harsh? Sadistic? Nah, just the appropriate reaction to EPI FUN!
TEAM T WIFE and I now have matching ROCK CLIMBER HASP CONTROL KEYS that we wear on our persons 24 hours a day now as well.......
2 comments:
and the music... you think of everything!
i think mom might have had a crush on one of the guys on the emergency show :)
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