WORLD WIDE REDNECK ENGINEERING HALL OF FAME!

Welcome to today's live broadcast from the Worldwide Redneck Engineering Hall Of Fame. Here are just a few items on display from TEAM-T that were built over the years.....You must know that most of these items are out of necessity either from NO MONEY or PAIN experienced dragging stuff, hauling stuff, and listening to kids scream and throw poo....

Let's start first with this item. This lovely item lived it's former life as a ROTO-TILLER. I couldn't help but stop as I saw it abandoned, helpless, on the side of the road at someone's trash can. You know the old saying, one man's trash is another redneck's lawn furniture....I removed the blown motor. Then I put it into my redneck thinker shop better known as a pole barn and stared at the old roto-tiller frame for about 2 months. I pondered, what can I use this for? Then one day, it came to me. I'LL MAKE IT INTO A DEER HAULER! I hate hauling dead deer. I like hunting them, shooting them, and most importantly eating them....But man, do I HATE hauling them.

It all happened on a Saturday. I walked into my thinker shop and started grabbing stuff. An old grill, the wood box from horseshoes I got for Christmas, a broke-ass metal snow-shovel..........I cut the grill portion in half, sawed the beautiful box the horseshoe's came in that I got for Christmas, and burned off the wood handle of the shovel as it really frustrated me and I lost control since it wouldn't come off the shovel part. I then started drilling holes, and screwing things together. Which brings me to another quick point, go out in your garage and throw all of your screws away. Quit saving them. Now, go to Walmart and buy 27 boxes of drywall screws in varying lengths. They work for EVERY SINGLE PROJECT YOU COULD EVER NEED! Unless you are building your own airplane or hanglider, then you might want something else. I would have fixed my own tooth-crown problem had I been able to find a small enough drywall screw to screw into the post installed by the dentist...Actually, JB WELD would have worked for that....Anyway...

Three cans of camo paint and BLAMMO! A DEER HAULER! TOTAL COST:$4.98 for the paint and drywall screws. Look at the first picture and imagine a dead deer sitting in this thing like its a wheelchair and you can see just how functional it is! And the big fat roto-redneck tires make hauling the small deer I kill very easy!

Item #2 up for consideration into the Redneck Engineering Hall of Fame comes to us from the outdoors section as well. For any of you that have ever dragged stuff out onto the ice, you know why I built this. Of course, this is a hillbilly problem I created as I bring way too much stuff. I just like being comfortable. So as my wife told me that I needed to bring this toddler bed out to the trash, my inside's began burning. You guessed it, I dragged it out to the thinker shop and let it sit for several months....

Then it came to me......I'll get some cross-country ski's and attach them to it! IT WILL BE MY NEW ICE-SLED! This sweet baby will haul my ice shanty, two buckets, a lantern, a large and I mean large cooler, a medium sized gas grill, three 5 gallon buckets, my ice auger (rides on top on the yellow mounts), two large fishing chairs, my famous CRAPPIE KILLER ALL IN ONE chair with side mount beverage holder, room for 6 poles, a tackle vault, and a large front compartment capable of holding about 75 perch......AND SHE PULL'S LIKE A DREAM.......IT'S MORE WORK FOR ME TO WATCH MY WIFE TAKE THE FULL TRASH CAN TO THE CURB THAN IT IS TO PULL THIS THING!

Item #3 isn't as redneck other than have you ever screwed wood 2x4's into the interior of your personal family vehicle? I mean have you deliberately, on purpose, with both pre-meditation and excitement went to the hardware store and bought a 10 foot long 2x4 and when the guy at the counter asked what it was for you said, "it's for my van we are taking on vacation with my wife and four kids. I'm gonna mount NEW DVD SCREENS to the 2x4 and screw it to the ceiling." Well, have you? I HAVE!

O.K., put on your pretend cap a minute.........sit back into your seat....."This is your captain speaking, I'd like to welcome you today and thank you for flying with us. We will be flying non-stop to Gulf-Shores Alabama, your in-flight movies today will be Cat in the Hat, Elf, and Toy Story. Please let the stewardess know if you need anything and thank you for flying REDNECK AIRLINES!!!"

Not bad for 2x4's! Beats playing travel Jenga like I did in the car on vacation while I grew up....Total cost, $208.00. $196 of it was for the DVD screens!

So, what's your vote for best Redneck Invention?
My advice to everyone is start thinking out of the box......You might be surprised what you can come up with! There's a little redneck in all of us!